Nightmares
by omalleyanatomy26
Summary: Reid is consumed by exhaustion becuase of his nightmares. One day they cause him to faint at work which sends him to the hospital. Only then does the team realize how much Reid secretly suffers. PLEASE REVIEW!
1. Chapter 1

**I've had this idea for a while also!**

Reid had always hated his eidetic memory. It was great for studying and remembering important information for cases but it wasn't great for remembering stuff he wanted to forget. It made it difficult to get a decent nights sleep.

He never told anyone but the reason why he drank too much coffee was because could never go to sleep without having a nightmare. Before it was those cases they would work on...now every night he visted that graveyard.

Each dream was different. Sometimes Tobias/Charles had buried him alive. Others he was forced to watch as Charles killed hundred of people.

Whatever the situation was he rememberd the smell of the dirt like it was yesterday, the clinking of the shovel. The fear of being buried alive.

He trembled at the memory of that fear. He didn't tell anyone but it scarred him more than they knew.

All he had to do was close his eyes and he could smell the dirt. Remember what he was feeling.

Even those naps on the plan were haunted by nightmares. He had grown so used to them that he didn't really know what a dreamless sleep was.

And because of that he had managed to train his body not to wake up shouting. Of course sometimes he still did.

Other dreams haunted him. The time the kid was killed...the time he couldn't save Adam. Both Adam and Tobias visited him regularly, taunting him about it. They would whisper into his ear that it was his fault he couldnt' save them, becuase he was so weak.

He was used to constantly being tired. He couldn't remember a time when he wasn't. He hated it whenever the team shared dreams.

Garcia always had big epic dreams filled with adventure. Morgan had just plain weird ones. Most of Emily and JJ dreams were fairly normal but he could never really participate in their discussion. He would lie had say he didn't dream.

He often wondered what their reaction would be if he said that night he dreamed about being buried alive by Charles.

They'd tell him to see a therapist. He shuddered. He was forced to see one after he was kidnapped and that was torture enough, trying to reveal his deepest feelings to a complete stranger was almost impossible.

This week had gotten worse, though. The nightmares were just more intense and the case they were working on with the missing children did not help.

He was like a zombie in the office.

"Are you okay, Spence?" JJ asked, concern flickering in her eyes. "You look like you're about ready to faint."

"'M fine," he mumbled into his coffe.

"Anything you want to talk about?" He shook his head.

Why did he still dream about Tobias? It was nearly 3 years ago. He should be over it by now!

How does one really get over something like that?

He put on his bravado face so well that the others didn't suspect a thing. That's how he wanted it, but at the same time it made him incredibly alone.

"Hey Reid, do you have that file on that Grace girl?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah sure thing," he said and walked over to his desk.

When he did was when it happened. It felt like the room was suddenly spinning, even though he knew that wasn't possible.

He saw the other's widened and concerned expressions before he hit the floor, and as he did so everything went blank.

"Reid?" Morgan shouted. Garcia gave a small yell causing Hotch and Rossi to run out from Hotch's office.

"Spence!" Cried JJ as they stared at the collapsed body of Spencer Reid.

"Emily call 911!" Morgan shouted to Prentiss who had her hand over her mouth.

She quickly obeyed as Garcia tried to control her sobs.

As Morgan leaned over Reid they all stood there in almost paralized shock as they began to realize that they didn't know Reid as well as they thought they did.

**Kind of crappy ending but I hope you want me to continue!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews! **

Reid fluttered his eyes opened to find himself in a hopsital room. He saw a doctor was standing over him with a concerned expression.

"You're in a hospital, Reid," he said and Reid nodded slowly as he sat up. "My name is Dr. Thomas."

"What happened?" Reid groaned.

"You fainted."

"Fainted?"

The doctor nodded.

"Do you...know why?"

"Yes. There are many reasons why someone faints. In your case, it's because of exhaustion."

Reid lowered his eyes.

"Exhaustion?"

"Yes," the doctor repeated himself. "Now...I have to ask you some personal questions, Reid."

Reid sighed. He hated personal questions.

The bedsheets felt scratchy.

"Do you have trouble getting to sleep at night? Tell the truth now."

"Not...getting to sleep," Reid said, having to be tecnical. "But it's not actually a decent nights sleep."

"Why is that?" He sat on a chair next to him with interested and kind eyes. "This is important, Spencer, so we can stop you from winding up in here again."

Reid sighed again. He wasn't used to this.

"I basically have nightmares," he finally said and the doctor nodded.

"Constantly?"

"Every night," Reid whispered.

The doctor looked surprised and saddened at this.

"What about when you nap?Your team says you all take naps on the plane."

"Even then," Reid finally admitted. While he hated talking about it, it did feel good to talk to someone about this.

"But you wake up normally."

Reid nodded.

"They happen so frequently that I've trained myself to wake up in a normal way."

He sighed and looked at him with sad eyes.

"You do know this is fairly unusual right?"

Reid nodded slowly.

"And not at all healthy."

Another nod.

"In order to understand this situation better, what do you dream about?"

Real fear shot in Reid's eyes.

"It's all right, Spencer, no one is here to judge, or call you weak."

How did he know?

Reid sighed.

"I was...kidnapped a few years ago."He studied Dr. Thomas's face which remained calm but kind. Slowly he told about Tobias, not everything but enough...the being forced to dig your own grave part came up a couple of times as his doctor just listened and took notes. He also mentioned Adam and watching the kid die in front of him.

The doctor stood up then.

"You should...try to get some rest, Spencer. I'm going to want to have you stay here for a while...see if we can get rid of these nightmares for good."

Reid knew better to argue and nodded.

He left the room and entered the hallway where the others were waiting.

"So?" Garcia asked desperatly. "What's wrong with him?"

"Sleep deprivation," He said. He looked at the others. "Are you aware of how often Dr. Reid has nightmares?"

"He has nightmares?" Hotch asked,looking confused. The others did as well.

"I take that as a no, and yes he does. Every night in fact. More so everytime he closes his eyes."

"He...doesn't say anything," JJ said. "He claims he doesn't dream or remember his dream."

"He's was lying then," the doctor said calmly. "I presume you are aware of a Tobias Hankle?"

Morgan's knuckles tightened at that name.

"Yes," said Hotch. Rossi frowned, feeling a little out of place.

"He dreams of him and that time in the cementary often."

"That was...3 years ago," Emily said quietly. The doctor nodded.

"It's obvious that Reid's not over that incident, as well as other things that have happened to him. I'd like to keep him here a while for observation."

Hotch nodded quickly.

"Of course."Guilt filled him for not noticing this about Reid sooner. He should be aware about something like this. Why didn't he pick up on the signs?

"What are you going to do to him?" Morgan asked with proctectivness in his voice.

"We're going ot hook him up to some monitors while he sleeps, and to see how intense the dreams actually are and then try and find a way to stop the dreams from happening. This'll probably involve therapy."

Slowly they nodded.

"I thought..."Hotch sighed. "I thought hew as fine...I wouldn't have him working here if I didn't think he was fine..."

"He put a brave face on him for a long time," Dr. Thomas told him. "He was doing it so you wouldn't think he was weak."

"Why would we think he was weak?" Rossi asked with a frown.

"It seems to be one of his greatest fears, probably has to do with the fact that he's the youngest," the doctor said.

"Can...we see him?" Garcia asked.

"Yes, but don't get too upset with him keeping this from you."

They promised they wouldn't as they entered the room. Reid looked down when he entered.

"Guess you think I'm pretty pathetic now," he mumbled.

"Far from it," Morgan said quickly.

"You can't control your dreams, Reid," Rossi added.

Reid stared at Hotch.

"You want me to quit, don't you?"

Hotch looked stunned.

"Quit?"

"You don't think I could handle it now, right? Cause of the dreams? That the job's too much..."

"Reid is that why you didn't tell us?" Hotch asked, stunned. "I'm not going to fire you or have you quit because you can't control your dreams."

Reid swallowed.

"You're really worried about that?" JJ asked as her soft blue eyes stared at her.

Reid didn't respond but his expression said everything.

"As long as you want to work here you will," Hotch told him firmly.

Reid nodded.

"thanks."

"The patient needs his rest," Dr. Thomas said suddenly. "At least attempted rest. You may all see him tomorrow."

"Wait!" Reid begged as Garcia lenaed over to kiss him on his cheek. "Can't...can't one of them stay?"

The doctor sighed and nodded as he glanced at the others.

"I will," Morgan said quickly and Reid gave him a grateful look.

As the others left they began to wonder how much they didn't know about their young genius and how much he truly suffered.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews! I won't forget my other fics! Promise! **

Morgan sat next to Reid as they wired him up to several different kind of monitors. He could tell the kid was nervous.

"It's going to be okay, Reid," he said quietly and squeezed the young man's hand.

"I hate hospitals," Reid muttered.

"No one likes hospitals, Reid."

"I really don't like them...I remember waiting in the room with my dad as they did a bunch of tests on my mom...To find out what was wrong with her. I hated the waiting."

Morgan nodded.

"Try not to think about that now."

"And there was one time she got really ill and had to stay for a while...I sat with her in the room but I remember thinking how pale and weak she seemed. I had to stay with my neighbor."

"Let's think about something else," Morgan urged him. Reid nodded.

Morgan wanted to ask why didn't Reid tell him about the nightmares but didn't want to upset the kid.

He sat there until Reid let exhaustion sweep over him.

_"I'm not strong enough," Reid sobbed as he started to dig his own grave._

_"I don't care! Dig now!" Charles bellowed._

_The dirt smelled fresh. _

_He was going to die. This was it._

_Buried alive...he had heard horror stories of people trying to claw their way out and failing to do so...now he was a part of those stories...of that myth._

_"Get in!" He climbed in the grave. "Lay down!"_

_"Please," he sobbed. "Please don't."_

_"LAY DOWN!" Terrified he obeyed and felt the dirt piling onto his clothes, covering his eyelids._

Morgan was shaking Reid who was jerking almost uncontrollably on the bed. The monitors were beeping like crazy as Dr. Thomas rushed in.

"Reid!" Shouted Morgan. "Reid wake up!"

Reid's eyes shot wide open, but the way he was struggling with Morgan it was clear he was still dreaming.

"Spencer, you're all right," Dr. Thomas told him as he tried to fight Morgan's grip, still in his dreamworld. "It's all right! You're awake! You're safe!"

Morgan did the only thing he could think of and slapped Reid. Reid sat there, blinking and gasping and trying to regain control of his body.

He looked at the them fearfully.

"What...happened?"

"You were having a nightmare, and a bad one by the looks of it," Morgan said, still shaking from the incident.

Dr. Thomas checked the monitors.

"It didn't take a trained eye to see you were in distress," he said. "You're heart was beating abnormally fast. That could wind up to be potientally dangerous in the future."

He sat at the edge of the bed.

"What was the dream about?"

Reid was still gasping for breath.

"Take it easy kid," Morgan said as he rubbed Reid's back. "You're safe now."

Dr. Thomas handed Reid a glass of water.

"Drink this, it'll help calm you."

Reid obeyed, glad to have something to hold, something to do.

"Just take your time," Dr. Thomas added.

"It wasn't that long of a dream," Reid mumbled as he sat the glass back down.

They said nothing but waited for him to continue.

"It was Charlies burying me alive," he finally sighed. Morgan closed his eyes. It was clear Reid hadn't gotten over being forced to dig your own grave. He wasn't sure if he would.

Dr. Thomas nodded.

"Is this...a reaccuring dream? Him burying you alive?"

Reid nodded.

"A lot of times the team's above me but they don't know where I am so they leave..."

"Jesus," Morgan muttered.

Dr. Thomas sighed as he saw the kid was still exhausted.

"All right. I want you to try sleeping again and if you still wake up with a bad dream we'll give you some pills."

Reid nodded. Morgan could tell he wasn't getting any sleep anytime soon but all he cared about was making sure those nightmares went away.

He hated not being able to protect the kid from this.

He watched as Reid tried to drift asleep.

* * *

The others came into the room and were about to say something when they noticed Reid was still asleep. Morgan fluttered his eyes open and shook his head quickly at the group. He ushured them out the room.

"Finally," sighed JJ with a smile.

"Yeah after taking some pills," muttered Morgan.

"He couldn't sleep on his own?" Hotch asked and Morgan shook his head.

"He had two nightmares before they gave him a pill and then they gave him another pill when the first one wasn't strong enough and he woke up for a third time...the amount of times that kid wakes from his nightmares I'm stunned he's able to get out of bed."

He rubbed his forehead.

"We're gonna have to find him a therapist," he added and Hotch nodded.

"I'll start looking for one."

"A sleep therapist, right?" Garcia asked.

"That's right babygirl." She nodded.

"I have a friend who's a sleep therapist. I could give him a call."

"That'd be great," Morgan said as he kissed her forehead. He headed back to the room.

"Wait," said Rossi. "Where are you going?"

"Back there...with Reid."

"You're gonna need sleep too, unless you want to wind up like him," Emily told him. He sighed/.

"He's not staying alone.

"I'll stay," Hotch said, surprising them all. "Rossi, you can take over at the office for the day."

They nodded.

"Call me if there's any changes," Morgan told Hotch who nodded and lsowly all of them left as they tried not to worry too much about Reid.

Morgan couldn't get that night out of his head.

He didn't want to tell anyone but he was truly scared for what Reid was going through and wondered if he could ever truly recover from something like this, from something you couldn't control.


End file.
